I love my little family

I'm starting to understand why people continue to have more children. I am absolutely smitten with my baby. I just love every squishy little bit of him, all the faces he makes, even his cries.
I have to admit all the weeks leading up to pretty much only last week, have been really difficult. I'm even willing to admit that for a while I hated my baby more often than I loved him. He just cried ALL. THE. TIME. A lot of the time I wondered that the hell I had done with my life. I mourned the loss of my freedom and personality. Most mornings I would wake up and dread the day ahead, and think, "I can't do this again."

I'm not sure how this happened but suddenly Angus and I just 'clicked.' I am beginning to see his BIG personality emerge, and it helps to put myself in his shoes and imagine what it's like for him. It helps me have empathy when he's screaming.

This morning Aaron got up early, went downtown, and brought back coffee and muffins while I was still in bed. Normally I would have been PISSED that he had woken me up, but he was forgiven for waking me up with the beautiful aroma of coffee... and I didn't have to get up and MAKE coffee, which was even better. What a guy! Every woman deserves a man who treats them as good as Aaron treats me.

I'm having a hard time concentrating over the howl of the blowdryer, but it's the only thing keeping Angus happy right now. The blowdryer is truly a wondrous device! I use it sometimes on Angus's bum when he has a rash. (Thank you Chelsea, for that tip.) It dries the bum, calms the baby, and makes my hair look like an afro. Amazing.

I'm sitting with an ice cube in my pants. I never thought I would tell the world that, but then again, I never thought I'd be the type of person to get a hermhemohriohd.
But YOU push a ten-pound baby out of your vagina without pooping on the doctor and turning yourself inside out and popping every blood vessel in your body... So don't judge me until you've done it.

There are a lot of things about pregnancy and chilbirth that I wish I had been warned about. It's as if women who have done it have to keep these things a delicious little secret to themselves because it gives them pleasure to watch their comrades go through the shock and horror of it all without any fair warning. I know I'M kind of enjoying it, because I'm so thankful it's over for me and now I'm on the other side and it's MY TURN to watch innocent women, ripe with life and all glowing and dreamy-looking, dreaming about their angelic little babies who will be all rainbows and sunshine and snuggles and smiles, and laugh maniacally to myself because I know IT'S NOT LIKE THAT AT ALL.

I forgot that I wasn't supposed to drink coffee anymore. Damn you Aaron, I'm not supposed to drink coffee, why did you go and ruin it by bringing me coffee in bed? Shit. Angus is irritable and it's all your fault.