Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Welcome

Dear Internet,

Welcome to my life! After much urging from friends and family, I've decided to start a blog. I always thought they were for self-absorbed navel-gazers, so I always avoided it. But as it turns out, I am actually pretty self-absorbed, and I DO enjoy gazing at my nipple, I mean navel... so here we go.

Who would want to read about my life anyway? Unless you actually want to read lengthy diatribes about the color and texture of my son's poop, or the current state of my nipples, I suggest you move on to something more interesting to read. Otherwise, welcome to the world of.... The New Mother. EEEEEEK!!! Excitement to come!!

A warning: some content may be offensive to some readers. I'm probably going to swear. Also, there's no doubt I'm going to offend someone out there, either because I know them and want to embarrass them, or by admitting to something that warrants having my child taken away from me. For example, today I was to Wal-Mart to pick up some Tinactin (fast-actin' Tinactin!) because somebody told me that it was good for diaper rash, and as I bent over to pick it up off the bottom shelf, my eight-week-old son nearly slipped out of his Snugli and landed on his head.
Things like that.

In the course of doing this, I really hope to learn how to spell properly. Also, I may use words that I don't really know the meaning of just to sound smart. I have this reservoir in my brain full of words, but I have a memory like a sieve, and the attention span of a goldfish, so the meanings are often forgotten.

I think I'll begin by posting a letter I wrote to my son yesterday.

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